power bill

So, remember when the West family used to use electricity at their house? Yeah, those were good times. That was before I opened the $1,400 power bill yesterday. Needless to say, there some immediate changes were instituted.

First, this is our new clothes dryer.


It uses way less electricity than our old one did.


Change #2: This is what I look like now.

I know what you're thinking.

First, that looks a lot like Weird Al. I don't really see the resemblance, but whatever.

Second, how does growing a huge beard save power? Static electricity. Duh- think about it. Third, why would you dress in heavy black clothes? Wouldn't that make it hotter? Yes, actually you're right. It's ridiculous, but I look super cool.

But the point is, we're getting back to our roots. Going green. We're going to be using candles for lights and paper fans for breezes from now on. Refrigeration is for morons and electricity is for losers I say. I lost at least 3 years of my life when I opened that bill. I can't afford to do that every month.

Kasie asked yesterday, "Is this how we're going to live the rest of our life?" (Read that in the expasperated tone of a woman who has recently crossed the plains in a covered wagon and just looked over the top of a recent rise, only to see hundreds more miles of wilderness ahead of her. That should give you an idea of the precise tone. The thermostat was set to 84, which was why all the moaning.) "Of course not," I said. "Once the winter comes, it won't be this hot."

So if you were looking to buy Kasie a sympathy gift. Might I suggest this title?